The couch cushions: You came running in here during the cookout with a hot dog, and I asked you – you remember Iasked you, my terrible little child – if you had remembered to get a plate with your hot dog. You told me you forgot to get a plate because you had a plate with your hamburger on it but it was okay because you were going to wash your hands really good before you sat down, even though I told you that there was too much mustard on that hot dog. I said I could seebig drips of mustard on the end of that hot dog? Do you remember? Because you said “no, mommy” and then you sat on the couch and then there werebig mustard stains on the couch afterwards.
Melanie’s flower dress: Your little sister loves that dress, but now it is covered in mustard stains. This is because your father said you could play with Captain Mustard, isn’t it?
Note to our readers: Captain Mustard was an unpopular children’s toy that was manufactured and sold between 1995 and 1998. He was part of the Condiment Corps, and Captain Mustard himself had a large fluid reservoir that could be filled up with mustard that would squirt out when you pressed a button on the back of his head. The mustard in the short-lived animated series came out of his mouth, but on the toy it was a squirt dispenser in the center of his chest. I’m sorry, I forgot to mention that this WRUP is set in Alberta, Canada, in the year 1997.
The beat: Uncle Kendrick was keeping the beat here and he wanted to put mustard on it himself for his new single, but then you got mustard on it already. He came by and he was visibly upset. He nearly cried. When I apologized and offered to replace the beat, he said that it was fine and the important thing was that mustard was, in fact, on the beat. But you could tell he wasn’t really all right with it.
Note to our readers: Wait a second, this is referring to Kendrick Lamar mentioning “Mustard on the beat” in both his well-known diss track Not Like Us and his song tv off from his sixth album, GNX. That was 2024. I guess this can’t be taking place in 1997, although it could still be in Alberta, Canada. Huh.
Bonus question: Which fruit do you tend to eschew? Not which flavor of fruit, actual physical fruit.
Brianna Royce (@nbrianna.bsky.social, blog): It’s a toss-up for me this weekend: City of Heroes is on my list, as is Lord of the Rings Online. That carry-all sale is gonna get me.
I deal with kind of a lot of fruit allergies, unfortunately, and most of my favorites are risky, but if I could have just one fruit forever, it’d be oranges.
Chris Neal (@wolfyseyes.bsky.social, blog): I’m going to earnestly hop back into Palia this weekend since I’ve got a lot of stuff to catch up on, plus there’s a new season in The Division 2 kicking off and a hankerin’ for some City of Heroes or Star Wars: The Old Republic that I’ve felt creeping in that I may feed.
Bonus: I don’t know that there’s a fruit I don’t like. There are certainly some that I haven’t tried, and mostly that’s because I don’t know how to use it and don’t want to waste money on fresh fruit that would go bad in, like, a day or two.
Eliot Lefebvre (@Eliot_Lefebvre, blog): I’ve got some minor noodling to be done in my usual suspects, but it’s going to be a pretty low pulse this weekend just because I’m waiting for upcoming patchy things. You know how it be sometimes.
Bananas. Don’t get me wrong, I like bananas a lot; I just don’t tend to like themenough to eat them fast enough, so I tend to avoid them.
Sam Kash(@samkash@mastodon.social): I’ll play a few more rounds of Guild Wars Reforged. It’s been a nice and easy way to play while I’m out of the house. For some reason I haven’t completed Eternal Strands so I’d really like to do that.
Bonus: I love basically all fruit. Often that’s all I’ll eat in a day. So for fruits I don’t like… Probably coconut. I don’t really like a da coconut tree.
Tyler Edwards (blog): Continuing the grind in World of Warcraft. Doing something out of character and actually making a serious effort to get high end gear on my characters, just because there’s some mythic tier set appearances I like this season, and for the novelty of actually being able to get mythic gear playing solo. You’ve been able to do that for two expansions now, but it still tickles me.
Bonus: I don’t cotton to melons.
Every Saturday, join the Massively OP community and staff for What Are You Playing, our roundup of what MMORPGs and other games we’re hoping to play this weekend (with a bonus question or two for our amusement). Tell us what you’re up to! Go off-topic! And don’t forget to have fun!
